Practical Alternatives To Toilet Paper

Who would have thought there was a need to write an article about needing to make your own toilet paper. But in actual fact, DIY toilet paper is not something new. Zero waste enthusiasts have been pushing re-useable homemade toilet paper for many years.  These re-useable handmade toilet papers go by the name of “Family Wipes”.  You can buy them ready-made to look like a toilet roll complete with pull off sheets like these.    This may help you adjust, but far simpler are the Toilet wipes which are just pieces of fabric like this organic cotton toilet wipes ones on Etsy.

So how do they work? Basically “Family Wipes” are used in the normal way then they are stored in a toilet side bin and then washed when needed. I would assume that washing would be pretty regularly or the stink would become too much.

You can see a tutorial on how to make your own washable re-usable toilet paper wipes here. 

According to mymerrymessylife Fleece works best for her DIY toilet paper wipes. I can totally understand that as fleece has microfibres and we all know most good cleaning cloths are microfiber ones. So best to use the best on your butt too right?

Don’t want to make your own and just want to buy a ready to go roll of toilet paper? Check this very affordable option out on amazon. Grab a prime account and you could be wiping your self within 48 hours.

If you are totally grossing out on the washing the dirty wipes thing, think back to babies and re-useable nappies, we used to wash those shit loaded cloths, right? This is no different, is it? Adult poop versus baby poop?

So what else can you do to make your own toilet paper? Well, I was going to suggest the newspaper, I remember the stories my father would tell about the paper and who go to it first and take it to the outhouse. But newspapers are harder to find than toilet paper around here.  If you have newspaper than you can certainly use it for wiping your butt.  Check out this video

So still looking for an alternative to toilet paper? Baby wipes of course! that is an easy solution, but do remember not to FLUSH them as they clog the system and then you will really have a shitty issue. Ran out of baby wipes? then make your own using kitchen towel and lotions. These DIY Baby Wipes can be flushed.

Back to more throw away options for the queasy ones, Well these Clorox wipes work well. Far more expensive than toilet paper, but remember we are looking for temporary alternatives, not full-time replacements. Lot’s of stores like the dollar tree have inexpensive wipes like these too.  For the Clorox wipes, I would suggest using a serrated knife or blade and cutting the rolls in half to create actual toilet roll size rolls that will fit on your existing toilet roll holder. Again these can’t be flushed so you will need a bin next to the toilet.

Or you can go back to basics and use water, Asian countries have been doing it for years so why can’t we have a go too? If you have birthed a child then you probably already know this hack, the squirty water bottle of soothing warm water. Yep! grab a squirt bottle and squirt where you need to squirt. Use a towel to dry yourself unless you want soggy bottoms but you will be clean and fresh and if you add a few drops of coconut oil ( a natural cleanser) you will be baby bum soft too.

I hope this article on making your own toilet paper has created some comfort in knowing that you will cope without toilet paper, hopefully, the shit storm created by this panic buying of toilet paper will pass in a month and we can all go back to eating bran and taking out Metamucil with confidence.